When your child is labeled ADD it’s easy and common to feel confused, failure and guilt all at once. The truth is that what schools and educational specialists call a disorder is much more correctly termed developmental distinction. Consider the two concepts for a moments:
- Attention Deficit Disorder says your child has a deficienthat amounts to a disorder. The inference is that something is wrong with our child
- Atention Developmental Distinciton says your child is developing normally and that the development is distinct.
Normal development is development that is average. Much like a garden full of corn plants, normal corn developmen is lacking special distinction. And every corn plant contains the common elements of corn or we wouldn’t call it corn.
Children whose development is normal are not distinguishable. Children whose devslopment is different are by contrast, distinctive.
In speaking of attention and how it develops in children, only in rare cases does a child have a literal “deficit” that means something is genetically missing. All but a tiny fraction of kids who get labeled as ADD have all the tools they need to learn and get along well in life.
The challenge for parents gifted with children whose learning is distinctive is to not accept the normal response to differences in development. Most people are fearful of differences others. As a parent it’s important to recognize that the wisdom which gave life to this child through you is also equipping you to be a resource in your child’s development.
Be patient, kind and open to your own development as you live day to day with your child’s distinct way of being attentive. There are as many natural types of attention as there are people. Trust that your child’s distinguished way of being is as important, loveable and healthy as their voice, eye color and laughter.
